Here are some of the results of our Filk Writing Workshop:
RavenCon 2011 Filk Workshop
The Origin of the Pirate-Ninja Feud
(To the tune of “Yellow Submarine”)
In a pub upon a stool sat a pirate who’d sailed the seas
And he told us of his fight with the ninjas – the Japanese.
Chorus:
Ninjas and Pirates hate each others’ guts
hate each others’ guts
hate each others’ guts.
Ninjas and Pirates hate each others’ guts
hate each others’ guts
hate each others’ guts.
After many kegs of rum
the Captain sailed us to Japan
there to pillage, plunder, loot,
and do all the things a pirate can.
Chorus
In the Temple of the Sun,
silver, silk, and sake were abun(dant)
and the wenches there were fine,
so we took them from that holy shrine.
Chorus
When we came back to our ship
we found the crew who’d stayed had met the garrote
And before the ninjas left,
those sneaky bastards ate the Captain’s parrot!
Chorus
Their note swore eternal feud
if their priestesses we’d not release.
So we flipped Japan the bird:
What do pirates care for stupid peace?
RavenCon 2010 Filk Workshop
Mr. Dealer’s Room Man
(To the tune of “Mr. Tambourine Man”)
Hey, Mr. Dealer’s Room Man, let me buy your stuff.
I’m not sleepy. I’ve got room parties I’m going to!
Hey, Mr. Dealer’s Room Man, please open for me.
With my jingle-jangle money, I’ll come buy it from you.
I want to buy this whip
so I can wear it on my hip.
But my costume has a rip
One bad trip could make me strip
So I have to watch my step
Or I’ll lose a hundred hours worth of sewin’
Dress me up in suede
(and put me) in the Masquerade
’cause I’m hoping to get laid.
Here’s another huckster’s quote
You think you can go under it?
Hey, Mr. Costume Vendor, let me buy this cape.
My bits are taped, but they say I’m breaking policy.
Hey, Mr. Costume Vendor, save my dignity!
I just flashed the creepy fan boys who are following me.
RavenCon 2009 Filk Workshop
Sitting In the Gaming Room
(To the tune of “Dock of the Bay”)
I’ve been sitting in the gaming room
I’ll be sitting when I meet my doom
Watchin’ my luck roll in
then I watch it roll away again
Sitting in the gaming room, watching the dice roll away
Sitting in the gaming room, wasting time.
I’ve been sitting in the filking room
I’ve been playing my guitar out of tune
Watching the Fen roll in
then I watch ’em run away again
Sitting in the filking room, singing the song completely wrong
Sitting in the filking room, wasting time.
(Bridge):
Looks like nothing’s gonna change.
Everything still remains the same.
Except they moved the registration table
and I don’t know where the frack it is!
I’ve been sitting in the conference room
Monday came waaaay too soon
Listening to my boss drone on
Oh, God I wish I was at the con!
Sitting in the conference room, watching my life roll away
Sitting in the conference room… WASTING TIME.
